From people who have been through it

“If you're just starting this, the first thing I'd say is open the post. I know it's scary. I know the red letters make your stomach drop. But the not knowing is worse. Call someone, anyone: the council, a debt charity, even just a friend who can sit with you while you do it. You don't have to fix it all at once. Just start with one envelope.”

“I'm not ging to tell you everything happens for a reason. It doesn't. But you can get through it. I did, and I'm not especially strong. Try not to make big decisions on the worst days. I learned that the hard way.”

“When the debt first hit me I felt like I was going under. I kept it from my wife out of shame, which only made things heavier. What helped was finally telling someone. After that I sat down and wrote out every debt I owed, then worked out how to clear them bit by bit. It is slow going and some weeks are rough. Still, it can be done. Plenty of people have been where you are. Ask for help. Tell someone you trust. And just keep chipping away at it. That is where I am at right now.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are last week. Chasing losses. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are three weeks ago. Bailiff letters. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are in the spring. Hiding it from my partner. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“If you're at the start of this, I won't pretend it's easy. The first few months were the worst of my life. But I'm writing this from the other side, and some days now I forget to be sad and free debt advice was the best call I made, they dealt with the creditors for me. Go slowly.”

“If you're at the start of this, I won't pretend it's easy. The first few months were the worst of my life. But I'm writing this from the other side, and some days now I forget to be sad. Check what benefits you can get. I'd been missing out on loads. Go slowly.”

“I am not going to tell you everything happens for a reason. It doesn't. But you can get through it. I did, and I am not especially strong. Ask your bank for a payment holiday, mine agreed straight away.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are two months ago. Lost my savings on football bets. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“I was sure I'd never feel norml again. I was wrong. I take it a week at a time. A day at a time was too much pressure somehow. Keep going, even slowly.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are last spring. Payment plans with three providers. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“Please be gentle with yourself, I wasn't, and it made everything harder, check what benefits you can get and I'd been missing out on loads, and talk to someone, even if it's just in here.”

“You are going to do the maths in your head at 2am and it will make you feel sick. Do it anyway in the daylight, with a pencil. The adviser did not make me feel small. Bring the letters. All of them, even the ones you hid in the drawer. You did the thing that felt shameful and you can say it out loud now, and the saying is the start. It will not be fixed next week. It will be a plan. A plan has a date.”

“If you're at the start of this, I won't pretend it's easy. The first few months were the worst of my life. But I'm writing this from the other side, and some days now I forget to be sad. Check what benefits you can get. I'd been missing out on loads so go slowly.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are in March. Chasing losses. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“Dear you, I know it feels impossible right now. The hiding, the juggling, the fear of being found out. It's exhausting. But you're not the only one. I'm still in it, but I've started talking about it, here and to one friend. That helped. Take it one bill at a time. And maybe tell someone you trust. You don't have to carry it alone.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are in May. The police report. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“I'm not going to tell you everything happens for a reason and it doesn't, but you can get through it, I did, and I'm not especially strong and I keep a list of good days on my phone so I can see them when it's bad.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are last month, chasing losses. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something so it comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“Please be gentle with yourself. I wasn't, and it made everything harder. Free debt advice was the best call I made. They dealt with the creditors for me. And talk to someone, even if it's just in here.”

“Not sure if this makes sense. To whoever needs this: I was where you are in the spring. Bailiff letters. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are four months ago. A romance scam, 30k gone. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are in November. Betting apps on my phone at 3am. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are in May. Not opening the post. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are last week. The car finance. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are in October. GamCare chats. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“If you are starting to think about stopping, you are already brave. The first step is the hardest. I am not far ahead of you, but I can tell you that self-exclusion helped me. It is not a cure, but it stops the easy access. Tell someone you trust. I hid it for too long. You do not have to do this alone. There are people who understand.”

“Si estás empezando con esto de las deudas, te digo una cosa: no estás solo. Yo también pensé que no iba a salir nunca. Fui a una oficina de ayuda y me hicieron un plan. No es magia. Pero es algo. No dejes de hablar con alguien. Yo me callé mucho tiempo y no sirvió. Habla con un amigo, con un familiar. Y sigue regando tus matas, si tienes. A mí me ayuda.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are last year. Rationing my insulin. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“If you're at the start of this, I won't pretend it's easy and the first few months were the worst of my life. But I'm writing this from the other side, and some days now I forget to be sad and someone told me to do one small thing a day and some days it's just a shower. Go slowly.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are in November. Too ashamed to tell my kids. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“Sorry, this got long. If you're at the start of this, I won't pretend it's easy. The first few months were the worst of my life. But I'm writing this from the other side, and some days now I forget to be sad. I started saying no to things and it made a big difference. Go slowly.”

“I remember reading notes like this and not believing them. So I'll just say what happened to me: hiding it from my partner was my lowest point, and a year later I am ok. Not perfect. Ok. You will be too, in your own time.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are a few months back. A payday loan to pay a payday loan. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are after the new year. A call from the bank that was not the bank. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are six weeks ago. Crypto investment that vanished. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“Falling for a scam wasn't something I ever expected. But it happens. The shame sits heavy, and it isn't yours to carry by yourself. Tell one person you trust, even just one. Reporting to the police is a start, but getting past it is slow. You'll come through. I'm still working on it.”

“Not sure if this makes sense. I remember reading notes like this and not believing them. So I'll just say what happened to me: a debt management plan was my lowest point, and a year later I'm ok. Not perfect. Ok. You will be too, in your own time.”

“To whoever neesd this: I was where you are after the new year. Self exclusion from the sites. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are last week. Not opening the post. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are in the autumn. Rationing my insulin. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are last month. An ambulance bill for 2,400. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“I remember reading notes like this and not believing them. So I'll just say what happened to me: payment plans with three providers was my lowest point, and a year later I'm ok. Not perfect and ok. You will be too, in your own time.”

“Sorry if this is a lot. To whoever needs this: I was where you are back in the summer. Betting apps on my phone at 3am. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“Those letters on the doormat, I know. I used to step round them for days before I'd open one. But reading it, that's the bit you get to decide. Ring the person and say it plain, they'll have heard it all before anyway. And have a proper meal, not the scraps off the kid's plate. The breathing does help some days, and that's alright, some days is plenty. It gets sorted in its own time, and slow still gets there.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are six weeks ago. Chasing losses. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“Please be gentle with yourself. I wasn't, and it made everything harder so I wrote down every single thing we spend, it was grim but it helped, and talk to someone, even if it's just in here.”

“to whoever needs this: I was where you are after the new year. a loan I hid from my wife. today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. it comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are in the spring. Payment plans with three providers. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“I remember reading notes like this and not believing them. So I'll just say what happened to me: bailiff letters was my lowest point, and a year later I'm ok. Not perfect. Ok. You will be too, in your own time. Praying for strength.”

“I remember reading notes like this and not believing them. So I'll just say what happened to me: bailiff letters was my lowest point, and a year later I'm ok. Not perfect so ok. You will be too, in your own time.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are last spring. A call from the bank that was not the bank. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are six weeks ago. Minimum payments forever. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are last year. A payday loan to pay a payday loan. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“I'm not going to tell you it's easy, because it's not. The bills pile up, and the shame is real. But you're not the only one. I've found that talking about it, even just on here, makes it a little less heavy. And ask for help. The debt management plan we're on took some of the pressure off, even if it's slow. You're doing the best you can.”

“If you are just starting with debt stress, I want to tell you something. You are not the only one. I used to think I was the only one in my street with bailiff letters. But there are many of us. The first step is the hardest. For me it was calling a charity. They didn't judge. They just helped. You don't have to fix everything in one day. Just do one thing. Then another. And if you have a partner or a friend, tell them. Don't carry it alone like I did for too long. It can get better. I promise.”

“Cuando empecé con las facturas médicas, me sentí sola y asustada. Lo que me ayudó fue hablar con otras personas que ya habían pasado por eso. No tienes que saberlo todo de golpe. Pregunta, llama, pide ayuda. A veces las cosas se arreglan con el tiempo y con paciencia. No estás sola en esto, aunque a veces lo parezca.”

“If you're just starting out with this, I won't lie, it's hard. The bailiff letters, the shame, the hiding. But talking to someone, even a stranger on a helpline, can be the first crack in the wall. You don't have to fix it all today. Just don't let it swallow you. And if you can, find one small thing that makes you feel like you, like a song or a walk. It helps.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are in the autumn. The adverts everywhere. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”