From people who have been through it

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are in May. Financial control. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“I know it feels like the whole world is against you right now. It did for me. But please, tell someone. A teacher, a parent, a doctor. Don't keep it inside like I did. It eats at you. And try to find one person who makes you feel safe, even if it's just online. You are not the things they say about you. I promise.”

“Hey, I'm not far ahead of you. I reported mine and it went nowhere, and that hurt worse than I expected. But I'm still here, still sewing badly and walking by the sea. If you're waiting on a court date or just waiting for the day to feel normal, it's slow. Find one thing that keeps your hands busy. Find one person who doesn't need the whole story. That's what's working for me, most days.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are just bfore Christmas. Now I have kids myself. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are just before Christmas. Burgled while we slept. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are in February. The trial. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are in October. Not telling my parents. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“If you're just starting this, the first thing I'd say is tell someone. I kept quiet for weeks and it made everything worse in my head. The trial is scary but you don't have to sit there alone. Get the police report early, ask about victim services even if it feels like a hassle. Some days you'll feel fine and then a door slams and you're back. That's not you failing. I still have bad nights but they're less. Start with small things, like a housing application or one yoga video. It's okay if that's all you can do that day.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are six weeks ago. My car broken into three times. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are just before Christmas. No contact with family. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“I remember reading notes like this and not believing them and so I'll just say what happened to me: the school did nothing was my lowest point, and a year later I'm ok and not perfect and ok. You will be too, in your own time.”

“I'm not going to tell you everything happens for a reason. It doesn't. But you can get through it. I did, and I'm not especially strong. Grounding helps me: five things I can see, four I can hear, and so on.”

“I am not going to tell you everything happens for a reason. It doesn't. But you can get through it. I did, and I am not especially strong. Telling one person the full truth helped me more than anything.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are a few months back. Nobody sits with me at lunch. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“I know it feels impossible right now. I left with my two kids and spent six weeks in a refuge, and I still love him, which makes no sense. But you are not stupid for feeling that. Take the help that is offered, even if it feels like too much. And if you can, find one person who gets it. It makes the days a little less heavy.”

“I remember reading notes like this and not believing them so so I'll just say what happened to me: flashbacks during intimacy was my lowest point, and a year later I'm ok so not perfect so ok. You will be too, in your own time.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are two months ago. Dreading Mondays. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“If you're at the start of this, I won't pretend it's easy. The first few months were the worst of my life. But I'm writing this from the other side, and some days now I forget to be sad, the helpline helped me plan how to leave and I didn't know they did that. Go slowly.”

“For someone starting childhood abuse survivors: I know it's hard. I told my mum and she didn't believe me. That hurt more than anything. But you are not alone. I started therapy at 45. It's never too late. Take it slow. One step at a time. And if you need to talk, I'm here. I might not have the right words, but I can listen.”

“It happened. It wasn't your fault. It's going to be hard for a while. You'll jump at noises and check the locks obsessively. That's normal. But it won't always be this loud in your head. Find one person who will listen without trying to fix it. And take the bus with a friend if you can. You will feel safe again. It just takes time.”

“I remember reading notes like this and not believing them. So I'll just say what happened to me: afraid in my own house now was my lowest point, and a year later I'm ok. Not perfect. Ok. You will be too, in your own time.”

“I was sure I'd never feel normal again. I was wrong. I made a safety plan with my support worker and keep it in my bag. Keep going, even slowly.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are in March. Flashbacks during intimacy. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are in January. He checks my phone and my bank, today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“Please be gentle with yourself. I wasn't, and it made everything harder. I keep my documents in a bag at a friend's house, just in case. And talk to someone, even if it's just in here.”

“Please be gentle with yourself. I wasn't, and it made everything harder so the helpline helped me plan how to leave. I didn't know they did that, and talk to someone, even if it's just in here.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are in the summer. My mum did not believe me. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are in November. Nobody sits with me at lunch. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are six weeks ago. Mugged walking home. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“If you're at the start of this, I won't pretend it's easy. The first few months were the worst of my life. But I'm writing this from the other side. Some days now I forget to be sad. The helpline helped me plan how to leave. I didn't know they did that. Go slowly.”

“No sé qué necesitas oír, pero esto es lo que a mí me habría ayudado al principio: no tienes que contárselo a todo el mundo. Yo tardé años en decírselo a mis padres y no pasa nada. Busca un abogado que te hable claro y sin prisa, aunque te dé miedo la respuesta. Y si un día no puedes más, no significa que no vayas a poder mañana. Un pie delante del otro. A mí me funciona escribir. A lo mejor a ti no. Prueba cosas. No estás sola, aunque a las tres de la mañana lo parezca.”

“When I was in the refuge I thought I'd never feel normal again. The first few weeks are the hardest. You don't have to have it all figured out. Just get through today. And if you can't, get through the next hour. That's enough. I still have bad days but they're not every day anymore. You will laugh again. I promise.”

“Nobody told me that the bad days would get further apart so they do so mine used to be every day, now it's once a month maybe. Hang on to the people who check in on you.”

“Please be gentle with yourself. I wasn't, and it made everything harder. Telling one person the full truth hleped me more than anything. And talk to someone, even if it's just in here.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are in the summer. Still loving him which confuses me. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“I'm only 17 and I don't have it all figured out, but if you're just starting with bullying stuff, here's what I know. It's not your fault. Even if you think you did something to cause it. You didn't. Telling someone helps, even if it's just one person. My mum was annoying about it but she was right that I needed to tell her. I'm not going to say it gets easy because it didn't for me yet. But the group chat about me stopped and I played football again last week. That's something. The mornings are still hard but I get up eventually. Find one thing that's yours, like my cat Pickles, and hold onto it.”

“I was sure I'd never feel normal again. I was wrong. I keep my documents in a bag at a friend's house, just in case. Keep going, even slowly.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are in March. A non molestation order. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“I remember reading notes like this and not believing them. So I'll just say what happened to me: it happened at a party at uni was my lowest point. A year later I'm ok. Not perfect. Ok. You will be too, in your own time.”

“Sorry, this got long. I'm not going to tell you everything happens for a reason. It doesn't. But you can get through it. I did, and I'm not especially strong. I keep my documents in a bag at a friend's house, just in case.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are last week. A group chat about me. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are two months ago. Therapy for the first time. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are four months ago. My car broken into three times. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are a few months back. The court case is next year. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are two months ago. A non molestation order. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are back in the summer. My mum says ignore them. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are around Easter. A counsellor at the rape crisis centre. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are in the spring. Burgled while we slept. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are around Easter. Not telling my parents. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“I remember reading notes like this and not believing them and so I'll just say what happened to me: my mum says ignore them was my lowest point, and a year later I'm ok. Not perfect and ok, you will be too, in your own time.”

“Please be gentle with yourself. I wasn't, and it made everything harder. What hlped me was writing everything down before appointments, otherwise I forget it all. And talk to someone, even if it's just in here.”

“Please be gentle with yourself. I wasn't, and it made everything harder and I keep my documents in a bag at a friend's house, just in case and and talk to someone, even if it's just in here.”

“I thought the worst part was the chat itself. It was the Mondays, that heavy feeling on a Sunday night. If that is where you are, please tell one person, a brother, a mum, a friend, even the GP. It sounds soft but it is the only thing that got things moving for me. It did not fix it in a week. It just stopped me carrying it by myself.”

“Dear friend, I'm only a few months ahead of you. The first thing that helped was telling one person who believed me. For me it was my friend Randy. The second was writing down dates. It made everything more real. I won't pretend it's easy. But you can do this. I'm on the night bus now, going home to my own flat. It's small but it's mine.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are in May. A non molestation order. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are in February. What my stepfather did. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold.”

“I remember reading notes like this and not believing them. So I'll just say what happened to me: no contact with family was my lowest point. A year later I'm ok. Not perfect. Ok. You will be too, in your own time.”

“I remember reading notes like this and not believing them. So I'll just say what happened to me: no contact with family was my lowest point, and a year later I'm ok. Not perfect. Ok. You will be too, in your own time.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are in the spring. It happened at a party at uni. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feeling in your fingers after the cold. Keeping faith.”

“To whoever needs this: I was where you are in the spring. Still loving him which confuses me. Today I made breakfast, went to work and laughed at something. It comes back slowly, like feleing in your fingers after the cold.”